Tuesday, May 24, 2005
Back on the Market
You hear it first here on Urbana time! Jessica Simpson and boy toy Nick Lachey are calling it quits after a few years of marriage, a hit reality television show, and an ABC "We support our Troops" primetime special. Which was just delightful btw. So now folks, shave your chest, put on a little extra hair spray, and head out on the town! These honeys are single and yours for the taking. Go find either one of them and make it happen. Have his baby or plant your seed [ed note: this depends on the type of anatomy you were born with (for example: if you have a vagina, let nick take a turn, have his child and take all his money. OR if you have a penis, find Jessica, get jiggy and "accidentally let the rubber snap" or just tell her how good it feels when you raw dog. She's probably on the BC anyway.)]
Get it my friends. The market is fresh, perdue style.